When I Don't Remember You
by Blackrose Malfoy
Summary: Draco casts a spell on himself to remove all the memories of his relationship with Harry from his mind in an attempt to protect Harry from Voldemort. This is Harry's reaction. Harry's POV. One-shot.


**Author's Note: Hello all! I got the idea for this one-shot while I was watching an episode of Adventure Time with my daughter the other day. (Don't worry, even if you don't watch the show this will still make sense.)**

**Also, this is Drarry so if you don't like slash you probably shouldn't read this. As always any flames will be used to make s'mores because s'mores are awesome and delicious.**

**Anyway, thanks for reading and please review to let me know what you thought! :)  
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**Disclaimer: Harry Potter and everything in the Harry Potter universe belongs to J. K. Rowling, Bloomsbury, Scholastic, and Warner Bros (and maybe some others I forgot to mention). If this information is not correct I apologize. (I looked it up to make sure this disclaimer was accurate and that's what I found.) I make no money from this. This (writing fanfiction for the best book series of all time!) is just something I do for fun. (So please don't sue me!)**

**Additional Disclaimer: Adventure Time belongs to Cartoon Network. (The only thing taken from the show Adventure Time was the sentence "Please forgive me for whatever I do, when I don't remember you".)**

**Edit: To anyone who may have already read this I would just like to say this has been updated but no major changes have been made. The plot is still exactly the same. In actuality all I changed was the phrasing of a couple sentences because I am a perfectionist and there were a few things about this that were irking me. I just wanted to make that clear so no one would waste time re-reading this when all I've changed are a few words. :)  
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When I Don't Remember You

_Please forgive me for whatever I do, when I don't remember you._

One simple sentence was all it had taken to fill Harry with a sense of unimaginable dread. This couldn't be happening, this couldn't be real. But no matter how hard he tried to deny it deep down some part of him already knew it was real. He had just been unexpectedly thrown into his worst nightmare; and it was a nightmare he would never be able to wake up from because he was already awake.

He looked up from the letter he was clutching in his hands. His eyes instinctively made their way across the great hall to the Slytherin table. It didn't take long for a pair of steel sharp silver eyes to meet his gaze. Harry felt his heart sink when those eyes turned cold and hateful at the mere sight of him. He shivered and quickly looked away.

"Harry? Are you all right?" Hermione asked worriedly.

He had been hoping that no one would notice his distress but he should have known Hermione would have figured out something was wrong. She could always be counted on to be irritatingly perceptive.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine," he lied. He could tell that she didn't believe him but she simply nodded and turned back to the conversation she'd been having with Ron. Thankfully she was just as sympathetic as she was perceptive. Harry didn't need to explain that he didn't want to talk about it right now. In reality he didn't want to talk about it ever.

Against his better judgment his eyes again made their way across the great hall and again they locked with the pair of silver eyes he had once known so well. Draco, no he supposed he'd better get used to calling him Malfoy now, sneered at him in disgust before he looked away. This simple act caused Harry's breath to hitch as he tried to hold back the tears that threatened to spill from his eyes.

"Harry, are you sure you're all right?" Hermione tried again. Harry knew she was concerned and that she meant well but she wouldn't have been able to help him. She wouldn't have understood. How could she possibly understand that he was grieving the loss of a relationship she had never even known existed? If he told her now that he and Draco Malfoy had been carrying on a secret relationship for over a year she would have either thought it to be some sort of joke or suggested he visit the hospital wing due to suffering from delusions. No, he couldn't talk to her about this. He couldn't talk to anyone about this.

"I'll catch up with you guys later," he said quickly before exiting the great hall in a rush.

Once Harry was sure he had ventured far enough from the castle that no one would be able to find him if they searched he collapsed to the ground and let the sobs overtake him. He couldn't get the words of the letter out of his mind. He felt as if they were burned into his brain and he would see them every time he closed his eyes for the rest of his life.

Draco's last message to him had explained everything but it still made his loss no less severe. He explained that his father was going to force him to take the Mark that summer. That had been an inevitable event in Draco's life that they had both been dreading ever since their relationship had begun. Harry had always said, and believed, that they would find a way for their love to survive even after Draco was made a Death Eater against his will. The blond had always offered a placating smile in response but he had never echoed his boyfriend's words of hope. Now Harry understood why. In Draco's eyes there was no hope, there never had been.

Voldemort was a Legilimens; that much Harry had known for quite some time. He had also known that Voldemort routinely inspected the memories of his Death Eaters to ensure himself that there was no disloyalty among his ranks. What Harry hadn't known was that Draco was just as inept as he had been at Occlumency and therefore Voldemort would have easily discovered their secret relationship. And that was something that Draco would not allow to happen. He would never allow himself to be used as a weapon against Harry.

So Draco had done the only thing he could think of to save him. He'd preformed a complicated spell to remove all the memories of what he had shared with Harry from his mind. If there were no memories left for Voldemort to find then there would be no danger. His letter explained that he had broken Harry's heart to save him.

By erasing the memories of Harry Draco had also erased the memories of who he had become. During the time that they were together Draco had overcome his prejudices and learned to think for himself rather than just blindly clinging to the beliefs of his father. He had become a different person, a better person, and now that person was gone. Draco was once again the evil man that Harry had known for so many years and he always would be now.

_Please forgive me for whatever I do, when I don't remember you._

Those were the real Draco's last words to him. The blond had known that by casting the spell he would be damning himself to a life of committing horrible acts in the name of a Dark Lord he hated yet he did it anyway. He did it because he loved Harry. And no matter what happened, no matter what terrible things Draco would do, Harry would always love him too. And it was because of that love that Harry dried his eyes and made his way back to the castle. There was one last thing he needed to do for Draco.

* * *

Under the cover of his invisibility cloak Harry slipped into the Slytherin common room unnoticed. He was extremely thankful that no one had changed the password since the last time he had snuck in to see Draco. But this time he had an entirely different reason for being there.

Harry stepped into the dorm that he knew to be Draco's as he had done many times before and breathed a small sigh of relief when he discovered he was alone. He sucked in a deep breath of air in an attempt to steel his resolve so that he could follow through with what he was about to do. Before he could change his mind he made his way to Draco's bed and gently laid a neatly folded note on the pillow.

A single tear rolled down Harry's cheek as he turned to leave. This would be the last time he would ever see this place, of that he was sure. But even though his heart was shattered beyond any possibility of repair he managed to smile through his pain. What he had just done was such a simple act but yet it had brought him some form of closure. Draco's last request to him was to forgive him for whatever he would do and Harry had done just that. Even if his love wouldn't remember that he had asked for forgiveness Harry felt that he owed it to Draco to let him know that he had it. It was for that reason that he had only written three simple words on the small piece of parchment. He could have written anything in the world but at this point there was only one thing left he needed to say.

_I forgive you._


End file.
